What Bears Eat

(this picture has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with this post, but it was cute and what's a post without a picture? It's from his three year old check up... he wore the gown for about as long as it took me to take the picture. If you're wondering why it is just getting posted it's because I just came across it in my phone)

The other day while Dillon and I were in the car he asked me what bears eat and the following conversation ensued...

Dillon: Mommy, do bears eat candy?

Me: Probably they would if they were hungry.

D: Do bears eat honey?

M: Sure.

D: Do bears eat cats?

M: Ummm... yeah, probably not. I really don't think bears eat cats.

D: Oh.

A little while later he was singing a song from the TV show "Yo Gabba Gabba" with the words "There's a party in my tummy, so yummy, so yummy." He then started singing "There's bacon in my tummy, so yummy, so yummy." Then he says: Mommy, a bear would sing (and then he starts singing in a deep bear-ish voice) "There's a cat in my tummy, so yummy, so yummy" and he's been singing it that way ever since.

Not sure where he got the idea that bears regularly eat cats, but he's thoroughly convinced!

Out Of The Mouth Of My Babe

Dillon says some of the funniest (and sometimes annoying) things. The kid never forgets anything - he'll bring stuff up days, weeks and even months later. Here are a few of my favorite (and least favorite) things that have come out of his little mouth lately.

Something that he says all. the. time. that drives me insane is "what?" It's not so much that he says it probably in the neighborhood of five hundred times a day, but it's how he says it. It's like Whhuuuuttt. Loooooong and exaggerated and so annoying.

Another thing that he says quite frequently is "I'm upset." He never says I'm mad or sad, it's that he's upset. And I have no clue where this came from because neither Jason nor I ever says that.

I think that Dillon was born to be a nudist. The kid never wants to wear his clothes! This, for some reason bugs Jason - He is constantly asking me why I don't ever put clothes on the kid. The other day when I was changing Dillon's diaper shortly Jason was due to come home from work, I was trying to put his pants back on and he was not cooperating. I said "Don't you want to make Daddy happy by putting on your pants?" "No, I want him to be mad... at you!" Well, gee, thanks a bunch.

Back before Christmas we were watching the movie Mickey's Once upon a Christmas. There is a part in it with Huey, Dewey, and Louie. When Dillon saw them he said: "Mommy, too many Donalds!" Ever since then when there is a lot of something that is how he refers to it - as too many whatever. For example, "Dillon, do you want some grapes?" "I want too many grapes"

I took him to Disneyland a few weeks ago and decided to take him to see Playhouse Disney Live. I took him one other time and that was last May when we went with my mom and Nana. As we were sitting on the floor waiting for the show to start, Dillon looked at me and said: "Last time we came in here with Grammie and Nana." Wow! I was astonished that he had remembered something from almost a year ago - something that happened about a month after he turned two.

When we were driving home from picking up his Valentine's pictures he says to me: Mommy, my window get dirty. I looked at his window and sure enough - bird poop. I told him that a birdy went poo poo on his window. His response? "That is not nice!" The whole rest of the way home he kept saying, "why did the birdy go poo poo on my window" and "but, why?" We stopped at Starbucks on the way home and as we were leaving he saw a bunch of birds sitting on a telephone wire. "Mommy, too many birdies. (a short pause) I wonder which one went poo poo on my window. Maybe it was that one on the bell." It was a funny statement on it's own, but made funnier by the fact that we were about five miles away from where it all started.

He always wants to know who is singing when we are listening to the radio. During the Christmas season I constantly listen to Christmas music. One day while we were driving he asked me "Mommy, who's singing?" I replied "Mariah Carey" He responded "I don't like her... change it!" Jason about spit out his drink laughing so hard. A few songs later it was the song "Up on a Housetop." Dillon declared "Arrgh... a pirate song!" Why? Because they were saying (or so he thought) "Yo, ho, ho!" (You know, "Ho, ho, ho! Who wouldn't go!")

We don't eat fast food often, in fact hardly ever, but that doesn't stop Dillon from knowing the names of all the places. My three favorite names are: Some Boy (Subway) Jacket Box (Jack in the Box) and Carlos Mc Junior (Carl's Jr.) I sort of understand the Jacket Box one but the Carl's Jr. one baffles me to no end!

Jason's parents are Catholic and have a statue of the Virgin Mary in their back yard. Dillon was watering some flowers near her and inquired about the statue. My mother-in-law told him that it was Mary and that if you talk to her she can talk back to you. Dillon looked at her and said "No she can't... She's a statue!"

There are soooo many more to share, but I don't want to keep you reading all day.

Vanity

So, I'm not really a trendy person clothing wise (or any other way for that matter - well, except for my addiction to Coach handbags). I do consider myself somewhat stylish, but I'm not the type of person who has to run out and buy something just because it's new and in style. I have my own personal style that I am more than comfortable with. I know what I like and I like what I wear. There are more than a few items that I would never, ever even think of wearing out of the house. Those items include, but are not limited to: sweat pants, stretch pants, knit pants, t-shirts (the manly kind, with words and stuff - with the exception of my "Wicked" shirt), sandals with socks, pajama pants, slippers, bathrobes, clothes that don't match or that clash, shirts with loud prints (I prefer plain tops or tops with a basic design), anything that I consider even remotely ugly or completely out of style... those are just a few that pop into my mind (and don't worry, if you dress like this, I don't judge - it's just about how I feel comfortable). That being said, this is how I left my house Saturday morning:

and I was wearing these on my feet:

In case you can't quite tell from the pictures, I was wearing not only pajamas pants, but a pajama top as well - and they had penguins on them. I was also sporting a pink bathrobe, slippers featuring snowmen and la creme de la creme - curlers in my hair. I think that this combination breaks more than a few fashion no-no's. So, what on earth possessed me to walk out my front door like this? A sale. Yes, I went out dressed like this to save money at a local craft store. You received twenty-five percent off for wearing pajamas and an additional five percent each for donning a bathrobe, slippers and curlers. So, I was able to save forty percent of my total purchase.

And let me tell you I was highly embarrassed driving the eight miles to the store. I kept thinking that everyone was looking at the lady with the curlers in her hair wearing a flannel shirt with penguins on it. I'm sure that no one was probably looking at all, but I felt so self conscious. And when I got to the store? Yeah, I almost didn't get out of the car. I nervously peered through the front sliding doors of the store to make sure that I saw someone else dressed in clothing that would end up with a life sentence from the fashion police. When I finely did get out of the car, someone coming out of another store stared at me and pointed. I so wanted to die...

Once we got inside (I dragged Dillon with me - also wearing his PJ's), I actually had fun and forgot what I was wearing (until I had to walk back to my car). There were a bunch of other women (and one man) wearing equally ridiculous attire, they had donuts and other breakfast pastries and I saved nearly twenty-five dollars on my loot! So, the moral of the story? Sometimes, looking absolutely horrific pays off... and I need to loosen up a bit.

I Speak Chinese

So my little guy is multi-lingual. He frequently tells us to "vamonos" and sometimes greets us with "hola" or "ni hao." I will tell him that we are going somewhere, like the store, and he will take me by the hand and say, "let's go, vamonos" so there is no doubt in my mind that he knows what it means. As for saying "ni hao" which is "hi" in Chinese, I'm not a hundred percent sure that he knows what he's saying (and he says it so cute) but, twice when we've been out and about he has seen Asian people and said it, so he's headed in the right direction at least. And, as if he wasn't already cute enough when he says "ni hao" he will often say: I speak Chinese.

And I Thought I Loved Twilight...

Overheard conversation at Target between two employees - one of whom was pregnant: "I'm trying to convince my husband to name the baby Renesmee Carlie"

Hatched

As I was sorting laundry, Dillon was riffling through my wallet pulling out it's contents. He brought me over two pictures. I asked him who was in each of the pictures; the first he told me had Daddy in it. The second was of "Baby Nannie." It was his newborn picture and I told him it was from when he first hatched. His reply: "from an egg mommy"

Broken Vows

A long time ago I made a vow to myself. I would never let my kids watch Barney. There really is nothing wrong with Barney, he's just annoying. His voice grates on my nerves, his laugh makes me cringe, he is so over the top that I want to vomit and Dillon absolutely loves him. And Baby Bop.

One night a few months ago we let Dillon watch him. Only once. And then before we went to my mom's for the Fourth of July I went to Target to pick up some DVDs for Dillon to watch on the long car ride and what did he see? "I see Barney, Mommy" The kid has an amazingly enormous memory. It had been forever since that big purple dinosaur graced the television in our house. Fast forward to a few days ago... it's six thirty in the evening and Dillon is super hyper and it just so happened that the only show on is you guessed it... Barney. So we let him watch it. And now he wants to watch it all day every day. "Where Barney go, Mommy?" "I want see Baby Bop." Uggghh. I have created a monster. And broke my vow to myself. And I am sure that this is probably only one of many "when I'm a parent" vows.

Him Again?

Remember this guy? Well, Jason found him again. This time he was on a box of granola bars from Walmart...

Fun Stuff

Dillon is becoming so much fun and has me laughing every day. He says some of the funniest things...

Today, just for fun, I knocked on his door when he was calling me after his nap (out, night night). I about fell over laughing when he said "who is it?"

One day I walked into his room to get him up and he was very stinky. I said "pee-you" and he copied me saying "pee-you" back to me. Again I said "pee-you" only this time he replied "pee-me"

Dillon learned the word "now" and he uses it every chance he gets. He's so cute - he'll say things like "I sit here now." He uses it so politely and never says it like "NOW"

He loves to sing. He also loves to sing solo and will tell whoever else is singing "no sing, Nannie sing." His favorite songs are "Twinkle, twinkle, little star" (lyrics are: tickle, tickle star) and the ABC song (lyrics: a-b-e-b-i)

Batman

The other day Dillon watched the Batman cartoon with Jason. Since then he has been running around the house yelling "Batman" nonstop! He is constantly asking if "Batman on?" wondering when he can watch him. So, this morning we took Dillon to Target to get him his own Batman. So far Batman has gone with us to Fresh & Easy and Starbucks, he has played with Dillon in the backyard and now the two of them are watching Little Einsteins.

Mean, Mean

If Dillon can say your name, you better look out. He started out saying "mean, mean, man" around a month ago and now it has progressed to "mean, mean, everything." Already this morning both Elmo and his string cheese were mean - and he's only been up for about fifteen minutes! His favorite "mean, mean" is "mean, mean, daddy," but that serves Jason right since he is the one who taught Dillon to say "mean, mean, man" in the first place!

Bapes

Dillon loves grapes - which he calls "bapes." I had washed some this afternoon and set them on the counter to dry for a bit. I guess that it was too much of a temptation for Dillon because he decided to help himself.

Auto Pilot

Today I was driving to the bank - but I ended up at Target. I must shop there WAY too much - I didn't even realize that was where I was driving. (In my defense: the bank is across the street from Target)

Jack

Dillon has, for the first time, started wanting to bring toys to bed with him. He's really cute about it - asking for his stuffed toy by name. He has plenty to choose from: a couple of Elmo's and multiple monkeys. Lions and tigers and bears - oh, my. Stuffed frogs, a giraffe and even a cute penguin. Of all the toys that he has, what does he want to bring with him?

yup, Jack Skellington. He is such his Daddy's son!

Today I Am Thankful...

that Crayola crayons and markers are non-toxic. Lately, they seem to be one of Dillon's favorite snacks. The last few times that we have gone out to eat and he has been given crayons, after he colors for a bit, he takes a bite. And yesterday while I was making dinner - he bit the ends off of two of his Color Wonder markers. Oh, what am I going to do with boy?

Conniver

Dillon is such a little conniver...

Dillon: 'anana (pointing at the bananas)

Mommy: You already had a banana for breakfast and you already had dinner.

Dillon: (again, points to the bananas) Elmo.

Mommy: Elmo wants a banana?

Dillon: Yeah.

Mommy: Elmo doesn't want a banana.

Dillon: (points again) Baby

Mommy: No baby boy, you can't have a banana.

Dillon: (walks away and over to the pantry) cookie?

A conversation with Dillon

Dillon: Eat

Me: What Boo-boo? (didn't quite sound like eat and he's never said it before)

Dillon: Eat

Me: (to Susan) Did he just say "eat?"

Susan: Yes

Me: Dillon, do you want to eat?

Dillon: Nods yes and signs more



OK then.

A Funny Thing

Jason was throwing away some trash when he saw these people looking up at him:

He plucked them out of the trash and starts asking me where my church bulletin is. I tell him it's in my purse and ask him why he wants it. He tells me that he has seen these people before. And he was right:

Same people, same pose, almost same picture.

Oh, Christmas Tree!

Here is our beautiful Christmas tree...

Notice it is only half decorated. When we brought the tree home, Dillon was so interested in it. He kept poking and prodding it. I decided to let it sit for a day so that he would get used to it and he did and eventually left it alone... that is until I put the lights on it. As soon as I turned the lights on, he tried to pull them off! After he was used to the lights, I finally decided to decorate the tree. Once again, Dillon was back at the tree - pulling off the ornaments he could reach and swatting at the balls that were just above his grabbing point (he reminded me of King Kong which is why Jason put a monkey on the top of the tree). Hopefully next year things will go better and I will be able to decorate the WHOLE tree!

A Thing That Makes Me Go Hmmm...

I have never understood why people think it's okay to bring their dogs to places like The Home Depot and Lowe's. I think it's strange and unsanitary (even though I have yet to see one actually pee in the store). I mean, you don't bring your dog into Trader Joe's or Albertson's, so why to the hardware stores? It's not like the dog is there to pick out paint colors for her dog house or plants it wants to pee on in your yard. Is the dog going to install hardwood flooring in the owner's house or put up vinyl fencing? No, it's not. Do dogs enjoy going shopping at Lowe's as much as I do? I highly doubt it. I guess some little dogs look kind of cute riding around in the shopping cart, but why do people bring their big dogs in there on leashes? If the dog needs exercise, take it for a walk around the neighborhood or put it on a treadmill. And as if people bringing their dogs to hardware stores wasn't crazy enough, I found the guy who takes the cake...

Yesterday I was at Lowe's buying paint for the kitchen. I am standing around waiting for the lady to mix all my colors and I look over at the long lines for the register and see a man with a bird - a bird! - perched on his shoulder. What, does this guy think he's a pirate or something? What would he do if Polly decided to spread it's wings and fly away? So long, Tweety! That guy would be having to buy a new bird! Maybe he doesn't care or maybe the bird's wings are clipped or something, I don't know. All I know is that pets don't need to go shopping.